Monday, November 2, 2009

Come Hither Fair Drama!

I have a feeling I like drama. I leave everything to the last minute and then hope and pray it all works out. Why do I do this to myself? I always say next time will be different – better. Well, when next time rolls around I’m still scrambling to get everything done. It doesn’t even matter what it is.

It’s like I get some twisted pleasure from not having everything sorted out. And then when I’m overwhelmed I complain because there is just so much; how will I ever finish; the world is ending!

Somehow, I pull it all together and I come out okay.

But why do I create this needless abuse? What is the point?

Do I not like being happy and enjoying school? Do I like stress and drama and ripping out my hair?

I would like to say no. I would also then be lying. I don’t try to like it (I think it’s all subconscious... boy would Skinner have fun trying to condition me) yet I continuously do it. Maybe if I wasn’t so good at dealing with pressure and feeling like my world is crumbling things would be different.

Maybe if the whole will I or won’t I scenario didn’t light my fire...

But I do my best under pressure. If I don’t feel as though the weight of the world is on my shoulders, nothing gets done because there is nothing motivating me. It’s the damn procrastinator in me (I really need to do something about my laziness, it can’t be healthy).

On another note: I’m really getting into the whole swing of blogging... I remember when I thought all bloggers were silly – thought the whole thing was a waste of time (obviously, I was wrong!).

Jeesh, next thing you know I’ll be on twitter.


  1. wow! I am the first to comment on this blog.
    Go me!! haha.
    I miss you silly goose! When will you be well enough to see me? how about this weekend? hmm?
    umm.. im also like that procrastinating! However, I dont like it one bit, I hate feeling like things arn't done, but I just dont want to do it. ahhhh!
    cant wait till this weekend, the animation openhouse. sweet!

    NO! I will fight my procrastination, tonight i will photocopy my song, and do my resume, and hopefully clean my room.
    If I dont get to the last one its okay though.
    I will feel better when I do it.

    haha thank you for helping me, but I do want to write on my blog first.. so I too can get followers haha.

    Have I told you lately how good at writing you are? Its not just your book, or your random stories. Like your blog is soo interesting to read. Maybe its just cause I love you, haha not, you are just sooo talented!

  2. Thanks for the comment (that was super fast! I had just posted!). I'd love it if you'd stop by again, once I get things going. :)

    I am the same way when it comes to procrastinating. Truth is, I don't do anything for no reason, and procrastinating does have it's benefits. I'm getting better though.

    I like your bookshelf by the way. I am currently reading On Writing by Stephen King for my Creative Writing class.

  3. Yeah! I'd love you to go on twitter as much as you'd love NOT having me as a friend haha! I don't know what your expecting me to say, but get off your lazy buttocks and go do some school work and stop complaining!

  4. Glad to find you here dear new blogger friend! :)


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